Decisions

by Mr. David R. Dorrycott

Merry sat silently on the rooms soft carpet, her long legs crossed under her. Her ruined right hand had woken her a little after three in the morning, as it did most mornings. Its pain had become her own private alarm clock. Kristi had become accustomed to the sudden movements as Merry awoke with her pain. This morning only opening one eye, noting Merry was headed for the bathroom, then slipping back to sleep. It'd been three long days. Long days filled with little laughter. Any Kristi had managed to get from the half-breed chipmunk had felt forced, even though it sounded normal. And no matter what she did the only time Merry let herself look even halfway attractive was in the privacy of their room. Even then only when she wasn't really thinking about it. When some story Kristi was telling took her mind from that dark place she now inhabited.

She'd spent almost half an hour with her crippled hand held in a basin of hot water. So hot the water was she could imagine her hand was slow cooking, until finally the muscles had loosened and her pain ceased. Kristi's Doctor friends had agreed, she needed special drugs. Micro-surgery, replacement of some of the bones and joints. Splicing of shortened ligaments, muscle grafting. Expensive surgery neither she, nor Kristi could ever afford. Even if they could the hand would never be right. Too much damage, to long left uncared for. Nerves were gone. Irreplaceable tissue rotted away. So they spent an hour every morning, and one every night forcing Merry's hand out of the claw it wanted to become. Stretching damaged tissues until she again had some use. Then they would carefully wrap her hand in the clear plastic form Kristi had brought with her. Merry hid the real pain, glass shattering in her hand, sliding along nerves to reform and shatter again. She managed, Kristi smiled and she had use of it for the day.

But it came at a price. Let her hand slip out from under her where it would chill in the night air... Hold ice a moment too long, even just type too much at her work station. She rubbed her scars, her gaze locked on the full moon easily visible from her position. Unaware Kristi was watching her, unaware she'd stopped thinking to herself and was quietly talking to herself. A conversation the skunk behind her could easily hear. "When Kristi let me hold her that first night it stayed warm... It was fine... But I can't, not Kristi. Oh God I wish I'd staying at that bus station, just died. No one would have cared. It'd all have been over" she whispered. "Something drove me to her. I don't know what but something..."

At least she could smile now. Her ruined teeth carefully replaced with expensive implants. Implants that had cost the police officer a large part of her savings. Merry hardly remembered that period of her life. Only the constant showers, being held tightly against her beautiful skunk. Unseen by the figure lying behind her Merry smiled just a bit. "One thing about being in love with a skunk" she continued, running the fingers of her left hand along the scars of her right. "'You always know where she is." By the time she'd recovered enough to notice Kristi's constant scent, a scent humans could barely sense unless they were within inches, Merry's sensitive nose had accustomed itself to the pungent odor. She rarely noticed it now, and then only when she'd been away from Kristri all day.

"Miss ultra-cop" she cursed. "Miss best in OSI. Human or animal. Super sexed tease. Hot rod car driver. What'd it get you anyway? All that work, sacrifice, denying what you were even though you always knew it. Throwing your life away. Could have gotten into NASA. Worked onna shuttle program maybe. But no. Had to go out and save the world. Miss Superslut.... Now look at you. Ruined, no use to anyone. Can't even do the job you spent eleven years learning for. Just an animal waiting to be slaughtered." She wiped at a tear, her sight so blinded by the moons reflected sunlight she missed Kristi's slow movements behind her as the skunk moved into a better position.

"Fell in love, with a woman of course. Could-ah been Sherry but we both knew that couldn't be. Sherry wanted kids, lots of them. Now she's rotting in some grave and I can't even visit it because its on a military base." She took a deep breath, held it, then let it out slowly. "And now you can't have kids either. No little boy asking why, no little girl to run around making messes. Nothing. So what if you fell in love with a cop. That wasn't so bad. She's even furred like you. Prettier, more intelligent even if she doesn't know it. Straight though. Not a chance in the world. God what would she do if I ever let her know I like to be tied up. That even when they were ripping me apart I was excited. Damn... Slut, that's me. Stupid useless pain-slut."

She went quiet for a long time, so long Kristi thought she may have fallen asleep. Then her voice filled the dark niches of their world again. "No home. No family, can't let them get hurt again. God I can't let Kristi get hurt." She stood slowly, walking over to the sliding glass door that lead to the hotel's beach. Looking back she stared at the lump on their bed. "No real choice Kristi" she said in a nearly normal voice. Her normally superior night sight still moonblinded. "I'm so sorry. I love you too much to see you hurt. I just hope you can forgive me one day." Opening the well oiled door softly she slipped out, heading for the beach. In her rush she forgot and left the door open behind her.

Kristi was out of the bed almost instantly. Where was Merry going. Was she running away? They had been like sisters. Merry hadn't let Kristi take it further, now she was running off? Where too. They were on an island dammit. There wasn't even a plane leaving for five hours and if that pepper-scented half-breed thought she could hide from a skunk... She made it to the window just in time to see her companion throw off her nightdress and dive into the ocean. "Oh shit" Kristi cursed, running for the door. Her own nightdress fluttered to the floor as she shoved the door wide, her feet kicking sand high into the moonlight as she ran for the beach. There was a dock down current from where Merry had entered the water. It'd give her the advantage she needed. Legs pumping, tail held flat she made for it as fast as she could.