Never Look A ...

by Mr. David R. Dorrycott

Dang Kagemusha, Captain of the Herbert Hotelship KLIPPER, husband to Jacqueline Hilaris Kagemusha, Klingon Centaur, and all around nice guy staggered into his suite (one of the many compensations of being Captain, lotsa room.)

Flipping on the light he quickly spotted the rather large potted plant, by the simple device of walking into it (the delivery crew having simply dumped the plant in the middle of the room.) Staggering back he groaned.

"Not another joke from someone" he groaned, looking at the strangely shaped plant. For he could see it appeared that someone had carefully formed a female shape from the trunk...

‘Strange' he thought, pokeing at the plants trunk, but he'd seen stranger. Especially since his marriage to the jokester Jack's sister. Just to be on the safe side he checked for trip wires, hidden packages and such. Nothing, other than the plant's pot was some elaborate structure of wheels and levers. 'Well' he thought, 'Its probably some sort of shipping device.' Attached to the plants 'waist' by a soft cord was a small plastic pamphlet titled, 'The Care and Feeding of Your New Japanese Cherry Bush.'

"Cherry bush" he wondered, "Never knew anything like a Japanese Cherry bush existed." Searching the plant he quickly located a large number of ripe juicy red fruit. Carefully picking one he sat it in the rooms scanner.

'CHERRY, SWEET, EATABLE, RIPE' was the computers response.

Picking up the fruit he popped it in his mouth. A bit sweeter than he liked, still who was to complain? Grabbing an ornamental bowl he quickly picked most of the ripe fruit, noticing almost as many unripe green berries hidden within the 'head' foliage. Grabbing a drink he plopped down on his favorite cushions to relax, watch a favorite show and enjoy the unexpected treat.

Glancing back at the strange little bush he chuckled. "Well, Jacqueline loves plants, she can figure out how to take care of it" he decided. He turned back to his show, alternating sipping his drink and popping yet another fruit in his mouth.

Almost through his show a dull rumble caught his attention. Turning quickly he saw the plant rolling slowly towards him. He scrambled to his feet as the pot came to a stop. Slowly the plants 'EYES?' opened wide, huge deep black pools gazed at him. A soft smile came to the beings lips.

"Hello Milord" the plant said, "My name is NeNe, I am Lady Snowaters wedding gift to you and your Lady."

Dang just stared, 'A living plant?' was all he could think of. 'But then' he decided, 'It figures. It would be Snowaters that sent something like... her?' He remembered the flirting snow leopard, and her taste for complex, safe jokes.

Suddenly NeNe's eyes widened further, she spied the almost empty bowl. "Oh wonderful" she squealed, "I was worried that you wouldn't like me, but Lady Snowaters assured me you would love eating my cherries."